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About Literature / Hobbyist Member JeremyMale/United States Group :iconhammerfallband: HammerFallBand
Hail Hammerfall!
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Xeronik
Jeremy
Artist | Hobbyist | Literature
United States
time to revamp my bio again...

i'm big into music, i try to write lyrics from time to time, i keep my collection of which on this site. i play guitar and have been trying to compose music to go with my many lyrics, but my lyrics greatly outnumber my compositions. i'm mostly into subgenres of rock, metal, and punk, but i find i can like at least one band from almost any style. i'm not on this site very often anymore, but i still come on once in a while for different reasons, like posting something new, or looking for cool art or cosplay. that's about it i suppose.
Interests

Journal History

the only things that inspire me to write are either satires of things, or my unending misery or moments of impulsive anger, and with this in mind, i feel like i lost the will to even writing anymore, i'm a broken record, and hell, i've even used that as a theme for my writing as well, so what's left?  when i am a person with no new progress in life to write poems or lyrics about, and i don't feel fueled to write about extroverted topics...

i mean, i could write everyday of how i'm a human waste, that i'm a leech on society and my friends and family, that i'm lazy and lack drive and seems like i'm only existing because i don't want to not exist, otherwise i have no point in living really, but due to stubbornness, i continue each day out in habit...

my fantasies of being a renown musician is pretty much as much of a struggling idea as a turtle wanting to be an olympic runner, it's been almost a decade since i owned a guitar, and i only composed one instrumental track, and i only have a handful of other riffs figured out, and plus i've written so many lyrics impulsively about specific situations, i can't even stand looking at most of them anymore, they are mere staples of a period of time for me, i can't use them for music...

this is all very difficult, and above all things, my past delusions of "soul-mates" pretty much died a couple years ago, even so, i feel that emptiness is still there, i hate seeing other couples, i try to be happy for them, but my deep hidden envy hates it, it's selfish, but i can't help this feeling, and yet, as much as i hate seeing it, i have to see it, i have to see others happy, i have to see those couples do well, i become vicarious, so as much as i am jealous or envious, i know that they deserve the love they share, and i will just be an empty shell trying to enjoy something i'll never have, through the souls of others...

~sigh~ i miss having creativity, i was a Dungeon Master/Game Master for a Pathfinder campaign i improvised off of Rhapsody Of Fire's Enchanted Lands, but that all went to hell when one of my players got caught smoking weed by his parents, which the blame was wrongfully put on my other friend who is a co-DM for me who was planning on starting his campaign soon, but now they are not allowed to be around each other anymore  -.-

all the creativity i expressed in my campaign is now left for waste, we don't want to play without the one dude, and plus, i've been trying to co-DM his campaign, so this really kicks me hard...
  • Mood: Depressed
  • Listening to: Dragonforce - Scars of Yesterday
  • Playing: Tibia

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:iconcorinne15999:
corinne15999 Featured By Owner Aug 22, 2013  Student Digital Artist
Thanks for the fave :)
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:iconxeronik:
Xeronik Featured By Owner Aug 26, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
oh yeah, i guess i forgot to comment, heh, you took that picture of the Grell cosplay?  it was cool  :)
Reply
:iconcorinne15999:
corinne15999 Featured By Owner Aug 26, 2013  Student Digital Artist
Thank you :)
Reply
:iconstrxbe:
strxbe Featured By Owner Jan 6, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Thank you for all the comments ahaha x'D
Reply
:iconxeronik:
Xeronik Featured By Owner Jan 6, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
yeah, i sorta just logged off of WoW and though "i should look at the gallery a bit before i forget to" xD
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:icontfcreate:
tfcreate Featured By Owner Dec 13, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Thanks for the fave.
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:iconpheradona:
Pheradona Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2012
I saw you Love HammerFall me 2!!! :love:
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:iconxeronik:
Xeronik Featured By Owner Mar 24, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
yays, hello there fellow Templar of Steel :D
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:iconpheradona:
Pheradona Featured By Owner Mar 24, 2012
Hiya =D
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:iconhelenshayleslie:
HelenShayLeslie Featured By Owner Jan 22, 2012
Hey :) I just wanted to know how you were doing? Hope all is well <3
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